Kenny's birth story as told to Kenny and Kate...

September 17, 2008 was a very big day for the Tucker family. Mommy and Daddy had been asked by the Doctors to meet them at the hospital around 6 in the morning to start getting ready for our new arrival. We had left big sister at home all warm and snug in her bed, kissing her before we left. We knew Aunt Nini would take good care of her while we were gone. When we got to the hospital the nurses and Doctor came to check on Mommy. They thought you needed a little help to come out. So they broke Mommy's water...but nothing came out to every one's surprise! You were blocking the way. So Mommy walked the halls, and walked the halls... and walked the halls. Eventually Mommy wasn't allowed to walk the halls anymore and had to stay in her bed and get some medicine. When it was finally time to push Daddy was right by Mommy's side. Nana and Grandma were there too very excited to see you were almost here. You had a lot of other family members waiting excitedly in the waiting room too... including big sister. With some pretty big pushes you finally decided it was time to make your way into this new world. It was very exciting! You were finally here! At 5:21 p.m. you were born. You were 9 lbs 9 ounces and 20 1/4 inches long, everyone said you looked as if you could be a football player! Your big sister came in the room as soon as she could and couldn't keep her hands off of you. She held you , gave you hugs and kisses, and loved rubbing her nose on yours.You were her baby. Your Aunts, and Grandpa's were so proud to see you here. They all watched you in the window of the baby room, laughing at you stretching out and just getting a good look at their new family member.

You were an expected baby with an unexpected surprise. You have something none of us knew you would have. You have an extra chromosome. We would all have to learn all about this surprise and what it meant. It is called Trisomy 21. It means that you have three of the number 21 chromosome in your body and not just two of them. The Doctors and nurses gave us lots of stuff to read and talked to us about what it meant. After the Doctors and nursed were done explaining some things Daddy and I wanted you I the room with us to snuggle you, and we decided you finally needed a name. We decided we would call you Kenneth Hudson Tucker. A very strong name for my very strong boy. Being the big strong boy that you are, your heart was strong and you had a very good appetite, so the Doctors, Nurses, Mommy, Daddy, and the rest of your family were very happy. You were proving before we even left the hospital that even though you had something we didn't expect, that you were a true miracle.

Life was not the same for us on August 29, 2004 when Kaitlyn Elisabeth arrived to our family, and life would definitely not be the same for us on September 17, 2008. We are truly blessed to have Kaitlyn, and we are truly blessed to have our Kenneth Hudson.

                          Tubby time... 
some of the best moments of my life...

To sleep or not to sleep... that is the question...

When you start the process of thinking about having children, you have so many thoughts that run through your mind, well at least I did.

When finding out we were pregnant we couldn't be happier, scared, nervous, hopeful... So many different emotions. I was always happy to carry them within me. Even as their due dates came and went I was content in knowing right where they were, and that they were OK. As the time got closer to them coming the sleep schedule started to change. Some nights the movement kept you awake, sometimes the size of the belly kept you awake, sometimes the babies hiccups got you, maybe tonight was your bladder, but it was definitely interrupted sleep. When they came, sleep patterns changed for the feeding schedule, the just staring at them, the watching them breathe. As they got older it was feedings, diaper changes, teething. A little bit older, it might be my tummy hurts, or their cough, the way they were breathing, the nightmare, the monster, the I think it's time for me to start my day at 3 am. Whatever the reason, the sleep pattern was interrupted.

As Kate is now seven and Kenny three you might think the sleep would settle back in to a regular pattern. But as these few weeks have passed by, it is not the case. Maybe they cant sleep because of the cat meowing in the bathroom downstairs, or the chicks peeping, or that it's allergy season, but those sleepless nights keep coming in. Sometimes I lay there and wonder as I have slept in every bed we own, in this house, in one night if and when the sleep, the good, long, well rested sleep will ever come again. But then I think they are just seven and three, we haven't even started...

The teenage years, oh what about then, will it be even less sleep? As many things as you think about when you begin to think about having children, sleep may cross your mind, but I don't think we give it enough thought. I am coming to grips that when you become a parent, whether they are a newborn or an adult, the bottom line is...you are still a parent, you you are always going to wonder if they are safe  and snug in their beds. Maybe that is why I was so content pregnant, I knew they were as safe as they were ever going to be, right there, with my heartbeat soothing them to sleep, and their hiccup rhythm putting me to sleep.

Eggs...

Eggs are funny things aren't they? Some people love them other people, not so much. They can be prepared so many different ways, and whether you eat them or not chances are you love some of the sweet treats that include them in recipes.

I think about eggs this evening as it is Easter weekend and although this holiday is not just about the eggs (Jesus is the reason for the season, right?) we have our hands full of them. Kate and her Nana spent some quality time together this afternoon. Nana took Kate and showed her how to boil the eggs to prepare them for decorating later. There were 18...but then there was a casualty so we were down to 17. Although Kate was VERY upset about the loss, I told her it was Daddy's favorite number, so I believe it was OK in the end.

We later prepare the table for decorating and Kate is excited about the tie dye egg kit that she got. We pulled out the other items needed and "set up shop." Kenny decides he wants to join in the fun so we pull him up to the table. We all settle in to our places. Kate starts tie dyeing, and I hand Kenny a white crayon to draw on his first egg. He is very content, and very adamant that it gets put in "bue." (blue) He moves on to his second egg, and once again insists on it going into bue. Kate is still tie dyeing her first egg. Kenny moves on to his third egg and as one might expect he drops it. It gets a good size crack in it. We proceed to say, "uh oh" and "you need to be careful". As we do this he begins to smell the egg. He smiles and says "big plop". Kevin and I look at each other and start to laugh. Kenny refers to his bowel movements as big plops. So we giggle. He then says to the egg "no plop on the table... yucky," something about the bathroom and once again "yucky". "Gross!" We tell him to choose a color he once again says bue, we convince him to choose green since egg two is still in blue, and he leaves the table. We try to have Kenny back to help us, but he decides to go build with blocks instead.

Based on our evening  I am going to have to guess that Kenneth will not be an egg lover any time soon, especially since his egg took a big plop on the table.

By clicking below you can see our beautiful surprise...


What a beautiful surprise...



Celebrating September 17, 2008

The blame game...

Oh the good ol' blame game, doesn't it just figure all those times we told Ms. Kaitlyn you just wait until he can talk. I'm not sure if she ever thought that day would come but it def came tonight. It was met with denial, it was met with dispute, it was met with tears. Tears from both ends.

Getting ready for bed in the Tucker household is not one written about in fairy tales, it is not a "Little Bear" episode, it can be somewhere between Judge Judy, Maury, some nights, Springer and every night sprinkled on top with a little bit of Oprah. There are always some troubles herding one of them up to bed. Some nights both, it's the same thing every night, "Time for bed, brush your teeth, pick out the book, tell the chickens good night (see post below) etc." Then there's the whole who is sleeping in the middle... whoever sleeps in the middle gets to pick out the book. This is where Maury and Springer come in. It's my turn, no me turn... then that normally means I lay in the middle and read the book. Some nights there is everyone holding hands snuggled in tight, with giggles and singing (some of our favorites include Bob Marley's Three little Birds, and the Carpenter's Close to you), some nights there are shadow puppets on the wall, every night has hugs, kisses and snuggles, oh and don't forget daddy's "pokers".  (What Kate calls Kevin's facial hair)

Tonight as I make my way up the stairs I heard a dispute of some sort, I turn the corner to find the bathroom door closed. Not normal in the routine. I open the door to find Kenny in the bathroom, in the dark, obviously upset. I get everything under control and he tells me "Tatee" turned off the light and closed the door. When confronted with that information, Kate goes into defense attorney mode. (Judge Judy) Then she turns to the jury ( Daddy) with alligator tears pleading her case, while the boy secures his place "in the middle". Then her attention goes to it's her turn tonight in the middle, in which I just take the middle to try to STOP THE MADNESS! (remember her Suzanne Powers?) Which invokes a discussion about how Kate is still taking the middle tomorrow night seeing as she is not in the middle tonight...exhale... Finally the story starts, the snuggles set in and the hand holding commences.

There is love at bedtime, there is a togetherness, once asleep a little boy gets moved into his bed. I once fought to have them put themselves to sleep, but then after bringing Kenny home from the hospital one time I thought, how bad is it really if they want to be together? How long is this really going to last for??? Even with the nights the way they are they still aren't going to last long enough, so I will take each night as it comes whether I'm an enforcer, a bouncer, a judge, as long as I'm the Mommy that gets to snuggle in the middle that will be my cherry on top.

For the love of... our children. When looking back on childhood do you ever think of the things your mom did for you? Do you think of all the times you ordered food when you went out (for us it was considered a special occasion) and hers looked better than yours... so she gave you hers instead? I think there are many things that our mom's did do for us that we forget about probably even to this day as we have our own children.  Good thing these days there is this thing called blogging so our children can read back on all of the documented cases we will have. Just kidding of course.



I think of the things we do for our children sometimes and wonder if they will remember, if it will create a smile when they look back. I think sometimes about the things we do and think of how I never once thought I would be busying my days with washing pennies or shopping for accessories for chicks. Chicks that are not outside but kept in a little girls bright pink bedroom, with an Aflac duck as a surrogate mom. Yes, I did say washing pennies. Washing pennies for days, washing 82 pounds of pennies to be exact. Why you ask??? Well for the coin drive at school for the playground fund of course. One of my customers had pennies he collected for 15-20 years. In his basement, in his basement that got flooded, in old coffee cans. After time they got powdery, green, and white. So I mentioned the coin drive to him and said if he ever got tired of the pennies I knew a good home for them. He gave up the goods. I should have known then that he gave them up too easy. Seeing the look on her face when I brought home these pennies was priceless, it was so  worth it. But washing pennies for days in my kitchen sink tired the shoulders of this mama. We looked up ways to clean pennies, we used lemon juice, vinegar and salt, ketchup, and Coca Cola. Which one was going to do the job? We even bought Tarnex a cleaner that warns to soak NOTHING in it for over 2 minutes.  They all did OK. Probably ketchup did the best, but how much ketchup do you need to clean 82 pounds of coins? If you ever have to help a child do a project in school to find the best way to clean a penny, we found the solution, we only regret we didn't smarten up earlier. The all time best way to clean a penny, pounds of pennies anyway??? Are you curious... is the suspense killing you??? A cement mixer. Yes you heard me a cement mixer, just put the dusty green/white corroded pennies in a cement mixer for about two hours and they will sparkle just like new! Well, needless to say we won the coin drive, the looks on the faces of the children and the teacher and the bestest girl I ever did have, my Kaitlyn made washing pennies in all of my free time, for two weeks well worth it...

Now on to the chicks (Flyer poops alot and mini man)... or maybe we should save that for a different day, just know they are content in the night snuggling up with their Aflac duck under their heat lamp with a beautiful little girl all snug in her bed in her bright pink room.

Parenting as all of us parents know can be difficult at times. Difficult to find patience, difficult to find strength, difficult to make choices... Choices, yes choices, there seem to be so many of them to make. Especially now that you are the Mom. (As I always say someday you will be the Mom until then it's my turn) But as a parent we seem to have so many choices and sometimes the weight of the world seems to be on your shoulders while making them.

I say this because as Kenny gets older there seem to be more choices that I have to make for him. Life seemed a little easier when he was a baby somehow. How hard is it to decide whether a diaper needs to be changed or not, whether it was time to feed him, or put him to bed? But now, now there are choices like school. What kind of class to put him in? A special needs classroom? A typical classroom? Even thinking "outside the box" how about alternative private schools? What is going to be the best choice for my son and his needs. Well, he has Down Syndrome, seems easy enough right? Special needs classroom seems like a perfect fit... but is it? Is it really the perfect fit for Kenny? How will I know, how do I know almost a year into that type of classroom setting? How can I still not know if this is the right choice for him? When will I know? Choices...

In being in a Special needs classroom he will and does get all of his therapies right in his school day of five hours. Yes, five hour days for a three year old. (Last year he had nine therapies a week at our home, and swim class). There are three to four adults in the classroom at all times with a ratio of thirteen students. They are constantly reinforcing speech. The staff is great.

Again seems perfect, right? But as a Mom some concerns come up for me, and I know, I really do know that no matter where my Kenneth would be he loves doing what the "big boys" do. Good... or bad. This year the "big boys" have "behaviorals". Meaning they have a "plan" for their "behaviorals". Behaviorals may mean different things to different people. Some may think it means not following directions, poor manners, talking back etc. But the parents of children with special needs know that "behaviorals" can mean violence, spitting, laughing at what they do with no filter, the judgement can be impaired from right and wrong. Can the children control it? Not always, and that is why they have a "plan", to try to curb the behavior, to try to put boundaries on it. This year Kenneth has been testing out some things he may or may have not seen in class. Is he still a gentleman? Most of the time, but he does have  things that come out of him sometimes that make your head spin. However you must remain calm, you must remind him that it isn't the way "we behave". You must be diligent in your efforts. You must get sleep at night, so you can do it again the next day.

Would having Kenneth in a "typical" classroom come with the same issues? It can happen anywhere right? It is what Kenneth decides to bring home. But sometimes I wonder if Kenny would bring home more ABC's than new behaviors to try.  Hmmm... Choices...